A man I live with read a post on my blog yesterday. He told me about it. He asked that I change names/use pseudonyms. I think that is reasonable. I will slowly go over old posts and edit these. Bear with me as I do if you are looking at anything in the dusty old archives!
I must admit, when I first started blogging, I asked those questions of myself. I guess I came to the conclusion that I didn’t care. I wasn’t telling anything but MY truth, so where was the harm in using real names. I guess I have changed my mind – rather, had it changed for me. But I am okay with that.
I live in a small country. I haven’t come across a lot of people blogging about infidelity in the way I do, from here – that is not to say that we don’t have infidelity – good lord no! I guess I had time on my side, all of the hurtful stuff happened six years ago so I doubted any “real” people involved would stumble across my still-bleeding internet corpse. But, maybe he has a point.
So I am going with it.
I haven’t decided on how I will label the players yet, but as soon as I do I will make the changes. I won’t change me though, I am still Paula, at least I was last time I looked in the mirror (and into my soul ooooOOOOOOoooooh!)
That man is a technophobe. So much so that he doesn’t, and never has, used social media. I never thought he wouldn’t know what a blog contained. He knows I have read these for a long time, and he also knew that I eventually started one. He didn’t get that it would be quite graphic (despite me telling him) and that is is basically a version of a twelvie’s Dear Diary. I think he was a little shocked – and probably a little hurt – although he denied this. But why else ask if I could change names? I am doing this out of respect for him. Not because I feel bullied into it, or that I did something wrong in using my truth, including names. In fact, as I type this, the only name I think I will change is his. Leanne deserves to be named and shamed – as if, lol! I have no problem if anyone thinks they know who these characters are. I am not ashamed of the role I have played in any of this.
So, there you are. Maybe I still “rescue” him. I don’t think I do. I think I am just respecting his right to privacy. Even though he didn’t respect my rights to good sexual health, love, trust and a lifetime partnership based on that love and trust.
(Oooooohhh, who made that snarky last bite???)